12- His Supplication in Confession
اللهم انه يحجبني عن مسالتك خلال ثلاث ، و تحدوني عليها خلة واحدة .يحجبني امر امرت به فابطات عنه ، و نهي نهيتني عنه فاسرعت اليه ، و نعمة انعمت بها علي فقصرت في شكرها .و يحدوني علي مسالتك تفضلك علي من اقبل بوجهه اليك ، و وفد بحسن ظنه اليك ، إذ جميع احسانك تفضل ، و اذ كل نعمك ابتداء .فها انا ذا ، يا الهي ، واقف بباب عزك وقوف المستسلم الذليل ، و سائلك علي الحياء مني سؤال البائس المعيل .مقر لك باني لم استسلم وقت احسانك إلا بالاقلاع عن عصيانك ، و لم اخل في الحالات كلها من امتنانك .فهل ينفعني ، يا الهي ، اقراري عندك بسوء ما اكتسبت ؟ و هل ينجيني منك اعترافي لك بقبيح ما ارتكبت ؟ ام اوجبت لي في مقامي هذا سخطك ؟ ام لزمني في وقت دعاي مقتك ؟سبحانك ، لا ايئس منك و قد فتحت لي باب التوبة اليك ، بل اقول : مقال العبد الذليل الظالم لنفسه المستخف بحرمة ربه .الذي عظمت ذنوبه فجلت ، و ادبرت ايامه فولت حتي إذا راي مدة العمل قد انقضت ، و غاية العمر قد انتهت ، و ايقن انه لا محيص له منك ، و لا مهرب له عنك ، تلقاك بالانابة ، و اخلص لك التوبة ، فقام اليك بقلب طاهر نقي ، ثم دعاك بصوت حائل خفي .قد تطأ طالك فانحني ، و نكس راسه فانثني ، قد ارعشت خشيته رجليه ، و غرقت دموعه خديه ، يدعوك : بيا ارحم الراحمين ، و يا ارحم من انتابه المسترحمون ، و يا اعطف من اطاف به المستغفرون ، و يا من عفوه اكثر من نقمته ، و يا من رضاه اوفر من سخطه .و يا من تحمد الي خلقه بحسن التجاوز ، و يا من عود عباده قبول الانابة ، و يا من استصلح فاسدهم بالتوبة ، و يا من رضي من فعلهم باليسير ، و يا من كافي قليلهم بالكثير ، و يا من ضمن لهم اجابة الدعاء ، و يا من وعدهم علي نفسه بتفضله حسن الجزاء .ما انا باعصي من عصاك فغفرت له ، و ما انا بالوم من اعتذر اليك فقبلت منه ، و ما انا باظلم من تاب اليك فعدت عليه .اتوب اليك في مقامي هذا توبة نادم علي ما فرط منه ، مشفق مما اجتمع عليه ، خالص الحياء مما وقع فيه .عالم بان العفو عن الذنب العظيم لا يتعاظمك ، و ان التجاوز عن الاثم الجليل لايستصعبك ، و ان احتمال الجنايات الفاحشة لايتكأدك ، و ان احب عبادك اليك من ترك الاستكبار عليك ، و جانب الاصرار ، و لزم الاستغفار .و انا ابرء اليك من ان استكبر ، و اعوذ بك من ان اصر ، و استغفرك لما قصرت فيه ، و استعين بك علي ما عجزت عنه .اللهم صل علي محمد و اله ، وهب لي ما يجب علي لك ، و عافني مما استوجبه منك ، و اجرني منك يخافه اهل الاساءة ، فانك ملئ بالعفو ، مرجو للمغفرة ، معروف بالتجاوز ، ليس لحاجتي مطلب سواك ، و لا لذنبي غافر غيرك ، حاشاك .و لا اخاف علي نفسي ألا اياك ، انك اهل التقوي و اهل المغفرة ، صل علي محمد و ال محمد ، و اقض حاجتي ، و انجح طلبتي ، و اغفر ذنبي ، و امن خوف نفسي ، انك علي كل شيء قدير ، و ذلك عليك يسير ، امين رب العالمين
12 - His Supplication in Confession and in Seeking Repentance toward God O God , three traits have prevented me from asking Thee and one trait has urged me on : I am prevented by a command Thou hast commanded in which I have been slow , a prohibition Thou hast prohibited toward which I have hurried , and a favour through which Thou hast favoured for which I have not given sufficient thanks . I am urged to ask thee by Thy gratuitous bounty upon him who turns his face toward Thee and comes to Thee with a good opinion , since all Thy beneficence is gratuitous bounty and every one of Thy favours a new beginning ! So here I am , my God , standing at the gate of Thy might , the standing of the lowly , the surrendered , asking Thee in my shame , the asking of the destitute , the pitiful , admitting to Thee that at the time of Thy beneficence I surrendered not save through abstaining from disobedience toward Thee and in none of my states was I ever without Thy Kindness . Will it profit me , my God , to admit to Thee the evil of what I have earned ? Will it save me from Thee to confess the ugliness of what I have done ? Or wilt Thou impose upon me in this my station Thy displeasure ? Will Thy hate hold fast to me in the time of my supplication ? Glory be to Thee ! I do not despair of Thee , for Thou hast opened the door of repentance toward Thyself . Rather , I say , the words of a lowly servant , having wronged himself and made light of his Lord's inviolability , and whose sins are dreadful , great , whose days have parted , fled , until , when he sees the term of his works expired and the limit of his lifetime reached and knows with certainty that he has no escape from Thee , no place to flee from Thee , he turns his face toward Thee in repeated turning , makes his repentance toward Thee sincere , stands before Thee with a pure and purified heart , then supplicates Thee with a feeble , quiet voice . He is bowed before Thee , bent , his head lowered , thrown down , his legs shaking in fear , his tears flooding his cheeks . He supplicates Thee : O Most Merciful of the merciful ! O Most Merciful of those toward whom seekers of mercy keep on turning ! O Tenderest of those around whom run seekers of forgiveness ! O He whose pardon is greater than His vengeance ! O He whose good pleasure is more abundant than His anger ! O He who seeks His creatures' praise with excellent forbearance ! O He who has accustomed His servants to the acceptance of their repeated turning ! O He who seeks to heal their corruption through repentance ! O He who is pleased with the easy of their acts ! O He who recompenses with the much their little ! O He who has made himself accountable to them to respond to supplication ! O He who pledged Himself by His gratuitous bounty to give them excellent repayment ! I am not the most disobedient of those who have disobeyed Thee and whom Thou hast forgiven , nor am I the most blameworthy to offer excuses which Thou hast accepted , nor am I the most wrongdoing of those who have repented to Thee , and to whom Thou hast returned I repent to Thee in this my station , the repentance of one remorseful over what preceded from him hastily , apprehensive of what has gathered around him , pure in shame for that into which he has fallen , knowing that pardoning great sins is nothing great for Thee . overlooking enormous misdeeds is not difficult for Thee , putting up with indecent crimes does not trouble Thee , and the most beloved of Thy servants to Thee is he who refrains from arrogance before Thee , pulls aside from persistence , and holds fast to praying forgiveness ! I am clear before Thee of arrogance , I seek refuge in Thee from persistence , I pray forgiveness from Thee for shortcomings , I seek help from Thee in incapacity ! O God , bless Muhammad and his Household , dispence with what is incumbent upon me toward Thee , release me from what I merit from Thee , and grant me sanctuary from what the evildoers fear ! For Thou art full of pardon , the hoped-for source of forgiveness , well known for Thy forbearance . My need has no object but Thee , my sin no forgiver other than Thee - could that be possible ? I have no fear for myself except from Thee ; Thou art 'worthy of reverential fear , and worthy to forgive' ! Bless Muhammad and his Household , grant my need , answer my request favourably , and give me security from fear for myself ! 'Thou art powerful over everything' , and that is easy for Thee . Amen , Lord of the worlds
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